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flawedamythystTitle: The Waterfall
Rating: PG (Vague warnings for death and divorce. And het.)
Word Count: 1,423 words
Summary: The day the divorce was finalised, Jack climbed up to the top of the waterfall.
A/N: This is the fic I wrote for my Mum's birthday, for the prompt two women born on the same day.
Huge love and thanks to![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
tresa_cho for Betaing.
The day the divorce was finalised, Jack climbed up to the top of the waterfall.
Kate had never come up here with him, although he'd asked her a few times when they'd first been married and it had felt like they should share everything. She'd told him then that it was because it was his special place and she didn't want to intrude, but in the later stages of their marriage, once he'd started escaping up there increasingly often after arguments, she'd told him that she thought it was creepy and morbid for him to go there.
The path up was so familiar to him now that he didn't really need to pay attention to the rocks he clambered over or the branches he ducked under. Instead, he thought about the first time he'd climbed up here. Lauren had skipped up the path almost faster than he could follow and he'd been forced to ask her to slow down, masking his inability to keep up with concern that she'd fall and hurt herself.
She'd laughed at the idea. The memory made his jaw tense.
Kate and Lauren had had the same birthday, right down to the year. When he'd found that out, it had felt like a sign that Kate was the one who'd be able to clear away the memories of Lauren and replace them with new ones. He'd wanted to be able to let this place go, then. He couldn't imagine it now. Every tree he passed and every rock he skirted around reminded him of Lauren and built the anticipation of reaching the top, where her memory was strongest.
It hadn't taken long for him to realise that birthdays were all Kate and Lauren would ever have in common. Kate was always too busy looking forward to the next birthday to concentrate on the one she was on, while Lauren had been too busy feeling the moment to worry about what might happen after it. For a long time he'd been unable to decide which way was better, but now he thought he knew. He was certain enough of it to have made this decision.
He paused at the top of the path for a couple of deep breaths once he'd made it all the way up. He wasn't as young as he had been and the climb was starting to leave him increasingly winded. He'd put this off for too long but he wasn't going to let any more years pass him by. Today was the day.
He stepped forward, as close to the edge as he ever went, which was still several metres back. The view out across the landscape went on for miles and still managed to take his breath away like it had that first time. The buildings of the town were visible off to the left, but in front of him was miles of rolling hills covered with fields and the occasional patch of woodland. Lauren had loved this view, more than anything. She hadn't been a particularly talented artist but she had spent hours trying to capture it on paper. As much as Jack had treasured her pictures, they were no comparison to the real thing.
During the last, bitter argument with Kate, she'd torn his favourite of Lauren's pictures off the wall and thrown it to the floor, smashing the glass in the frame and sending the shards flying like water droplets. She'd thrown hard phrases at him, like 'wasting your life on the past' and 'sick of living with a bloody dead girl'.
The divorce had come pretty quickly after that.
“It's done,” he said, his voice cutting harshly through the birdsong and distant rumble at the base of the waterfall. It made the scene suddenly feel more real and less like a distant memory or a film scene. “I'm divorced.”
Lauren appeared like she always did, as if she'd just turned a corner and appeared. Phantom water cascaded down her hair and clothes noiselessly, flowing down and blurring her familiar outline. The sun shone through her, barely even distorted by her presence and the water under her feet held her as easily as if it was the rock Jack was standing on.
“Finally,” she said in a quiet, whispering voice. It was the loudest she ever was now, and it seemed like a mockery of how she'd used to sound, how her voice had used to ring out bright with joy at almost any tiny thing.
The brightest it had ever been had been just before her death. He'd brought her up here – their place, the one spot where it always felt like no one else in the world existed – gone to one knee and fumbled out the ring box with clammy hands, barely managing to get the words out before she'd replied. Her voice had rung out then, echoing off the landscape and filling the world. It had been a perfect moment.
“Come with me now,” she breathed, stepping forward over the surface of the water rushing to fall over the edge of the waterfall as if it wasn't there. She held out a hand to him.
He didn't need to think twice before he stepped forward and took it. It wasn't the first time he'd touched her like this but the clammy, faintly electric and barely there feel of her skin was still a shock. The first time he'd felt it had been the day of her funeral, when he'd escaped up here to be alone and collapsed in on himself, trying to hold back the tears. She'd come from nowhere and touched his cheek, forcing him to look up.
He'd run then, right back down the path and all the way home, and he'd stayed away for weeks, months, as long as he could before his grief had driven him back up the path. She'd been waiting, of course. Where else would she have been?
She'd spoken to him and offered him the choice he was taking now, but he'd been too afraid back then. He'd still believed the platitudes from his friends and family – it would get better, he would move on, he would find someone new who meant just as much. He'd believed it all so strongly, but he'd never quite been able to stop himself coming back here, even when he'd thought that he and Kate were forever.
She led him forward to the very edge, the closest he'd been since he'd stood there and called out hopelessly after her. He looked down at the rocks and water below him and took a steadying breath.
“It doesn't hurt,” she said, but she was lying.
“I could always tell when you were lying,” he said, managing a faint grin at her. He'd never been able to tell when Kate was lying.
She smiled back. “It doesn't hurt for very long,” she corrected herself. The roar of the waterfall was louder here, right below them, and it was trying to drown out her softly-spoken words. He looked back at it, thinking of the way it had swallowed up her cry as she'd fallen. She'd already had her mouth open, glee bursting through her as she looked at the ring on her finger, then she'd stepped backwards, caught her heel on a rock and gone tumbling down, over the edge before Jack could reach out and stop her. Her scream had shattered the air for several horrible seconds, then stopped as suddenly as if it had been switched off.
He stepped back from the edge, letting go of her hand. “Wait,” he said. “Hang on.”
She turned to look at him, water flowing from her hair. “Please,” she said. “I'm so alone, Jack. Please, be with me forever.”
“I will be,” he promised her. “I just need to-” He pulled the ring off his finger. Kate's ring; the wrong ring. “This doesn't belong with us,” he said, and put it carefully on a rock. He had no idea if anyone would ever find it, or if they'd understand the significance if they did, but it seemed wrong to just throw it away.
He took Lauren's hand again and smiled at her. “Let's do this,” he said.
They ran together to the edge and jumped off it, hand in hand. As he fell, he could hear her beside him, her voice ringing off the rocks as she laughed with pure joy.
*
Rating: PG (Vague warnings for death and divorce. And het.)
Word Count: 1,423 words
Summary: The day the divorce was finalised, Jack climbed up to the top of the waterfall.
A/N: This is the fic I wrote for my Mum's birthday, for the prompt two women born on the same day.
Huge love and thanks to
tresa_cho for Betaing.The day the divorce was finalised, Jack climbed up to the top of the waterfall.
Kate had never come up here with him, although he'd asked her a few times when they'd first been married and it had felt like they should share everything. She'd told him then that it was because it was his special place and she didn't want to intrude, but in the later stages of their marriage, once he'd started escaping up there increasingly often after arguments, she'd told him that she thought it was creepy and morbid for him to go there.
The path up was so familiar to him now that he didn't really need to pay attention to the rocks he clambered over or the branches he ducked under. Instead, he thought about the first time he'd climbed up here. Lauren had skipped up the path almost faster than he could follow and he'd been forced to ask her to slow down, masking his inability to keep up with concern that she'd fall and hurt herself.
She'd laughed at the idea. The memory made his jaw tense.
Kate and Lauren had had the same birthday, right down to the year. When he'd found that out, it had felt like a sign that Kate was the one who'd be able to clear away the memories of Lauren and replace them with new ones. He'd wanted to be able to let this place go, then. He couldn't imagine it now. Every tree he passed and every rock he skirted around reminded him of Lauren and built the anticipation of reaching the top, where her memory was strongest.
It hadn't taken long for him to realise that birthdays were all Kate and Lauren would ever have in common. Kate was always too busy looking forward to the next birthday to concentrate on the one she was on, while Lauren had been too busy feeling the moment to worry about what might happen after it. For a long time he'd been unable to decide which way was better, but now he thought he knew. He was certain enough of it to have made this decision.
He paused at the top of the path for a couple of deep breaths once he'd made it all the way up. He wasn't as young as he had been and the climb was starting to leave him increasingly winded. He'd put this off for too long but he wasn't going to let any more years pass him by. Today was the day.
He stepped forward, as close to the edge as he ever went, which was still several metres back. The view out across the landscape went on for miles and still managed to take his breath away like it had that first time. The buildings of the town were visible off to the left, but in front of him was miles of rolling hills covered with fields and the occasional patch of woodland. Lauren had loved this view, more than anything. She hadn't been a particularly talented artist but she had spent hours trying to capture it on paper. As much as Jack had treasured her pictures, they were no comparison to the real thing.
During the last, bitter argument with Kate, she'd torn his favourite of Lauren's pictures off the wall and thrown it to the floor, smashing the glass in the frame and sending the shards flying like water droplets. She'd thrown hard phrases at him, like 'wasting your life on the past' and 'sick of living with a bloody dead girl'.
The divorce had come pretty quickly after that.
“It's done,” he said, his voice cutting harshly through the birdsong and distant rumble at the base of the waterfall. It made the scene suddenly feel more real and less like a distant memory or a film scene. “I'm divorced.”
Lauren appeared like she always did, as if she'd just turned a corner and appeared. Phantom water cascaded down her hair and clothes noiselessly, flowing down and blurring her familiar outline. The sun shone through her, barely even distorted by her presence and the water under her feet held her as easily as if it was the rock Jack was standing on.
“Finally,” she said in a quiet, whispering voice. It was the loudest she ever was now, and it seemed like a mockery of how she'd used to sound, how her voice had used to ring out bright with joy at almost any tiny thing.
The brightest it had ever been had been just before her death. He'd brought her up here – their place, the one spot where it always felt like no one else in the world existed – gone to one knee and fumbled out the ring box with clammy hands, barely managing to get the words out before she'd replied. Her voice had rung out then, echoing off the landscape and filling the world. It had been a perfect moment.
“Come with me now,” she breathed, stepping forward over the surface of the water rushing to fall over the edge of the waterfall as if it wasn't there. She held out a hand to him.
He didn't need to think twice before he stepped forward and took it. It wasn't the first time he'd touched her like this but the clammy, faintly electric and barely there feel of her skin was still a shock. The first time he'd felt it had been the day of her funeral, when he'd escaped up here to be alone and collapsed in on himself, trying to hold back the tears. She'd come from nowhere and touched his cheek, forcing him to look up.
He'd run then, right back down the path and all the way home, and he'd stayed away for weeks, months, as long as he could before his grief had driven him back up the path. She'd been waiting, of course. Where else would she have been?
She'd spoken to him and offered him the choice he was taking now, but he'd been too afraid back then. He'd still believed the platitudes from his friends and family – it would get better, he would move on, he would find someone new who meant just as much. He'd believed it all so strongly, but he'd never quite been able to stop himself coming back here, even when he'd thought that he and Kate were forever.
She led him forward to the very edge, the closest he'd been since he'd stood there and called out hopelessly after her. He looked down at the rocks and water below him and took a steadying breath.
“It doesn't hurt,” she said, but she was lying.
“I could always tell when you were lying,” he said, managing a faint grin at her. He'd never been able to tell when Kate was lying.
She smiled back. “It doesn't hurt for very long,” she corrected herself. The roar of the waterfall was louder here, right below them, and it was trying to drown out her softly-spoken words. He looked back at it, thinking of the way it had swallowed up her cry as she'd fallen. She'd already had her mouth open, glee bursting through her as she looked at the ring on her finger, then she'd stepped backwards, caught her heel on a rock and gone tumbling down, over the edge before Jack could reach out and stop her. Her scream had shattered the air for several horrible seconds, then stopped as suddenly as if it had been switched off.
He stepped back from the edge, letting go of her hand. “Wait,” he said. “Hang on.”
She turned to look at him, water flowing from her hair. “Please,” she said. “I'm so alone, Jack. Please, be with me forever.”
“I will be,” he promised her. “I just need to-” He pulled the ring off his finger. Kate's ring; the wrong ring. “This doesn't belong with us,” he said, and put it carefully on a rock. He had no idea if anyone would ever find it, or if they'd understand the significance if they did, but it seemed wrong to just throw it away.
He took Lauren's hand again and smiled at her. “Let's do this,” he said.
They ran together to the edge and jumped off it, hand in hand. As he fell, he could hear her beside him, her voice ringing off the rocks as she laughed with pure joy.
*
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